| The episode opens... | |
| Doc | Zak... is Kur. |
|---|---|
| Drew | No! |
| Zak | I'm the bad guy now? |
| Zak | My- my parents figure it was the Kur Stone. |
| Drew | No! |
| Zak | My mom was pregnant with me when they dug it up and there was all this weird energy. |
| Zak | Mom? |
| Drew | If the world finds out what you can do, they're going to come after you. |
| Beeman | Do we get a peaceful surrender, Frankenhair? |
| Zak | Who's there? |
| Naga | Master... |
| Rani Naga | Now that Kur has been revealed, the Nagas humbly place ourselves in your service. |
| Zak | I'm what, half Cryptid? |
| Rani Naga | You are all Kur and your destiny is set. |
| Drew | Get away from my son. |
| Rani Naga | You cannot stop the will of Kur, Saturdays. |
| Rani Naga | If the boy won't start the war on humanity, the Nagas will start it for him. |
| [Intro Plays] | |
| Doyle | I can't believe I agreed to this! |
| Van Rook | I know how the mind of V.V. Argost works. He will be nearby famous Cryptids. Why can't you just shut up and trust me? |
| Doyle | Seriously? You're the one who taught me to lie. |
| Van Rook | Yes, but only for money. I don't get paid until you get Argost. Why would I lie for free? |
| Doyle | Well, then maybe you're just wrong. Look, we've hit four Cryptid hotspots already, and this is the least famous of the bunch. There is no way Argost is- |
| Argost | Greetings and bien- |
| Van Rook | He broke it, he buys it. |
| Van Rook | Okay, we try the next place. |
| [Chao Phraya River, Thailand] | |
| Doc | I don't think it's a bluff. The Nagas are going to launch a first strike on the human race. It's just a matter of where. |
| Drew | It'll have to be a major city. The Nagas will want something big, something to strike as much fear as possible. |
| Doc | They're a semi aquatic species. We should focus on island cities. They'd be the easiest to hit by surprise. |
| Drew | That still leaves too many options. We're going to have to make a very hopeful guess. |
| Fiskerton | [Garbled] |
| Zak | I think they mean me, Fisk. But why me? |
| Drew | Like it or not, you are, Kur kiddo. So if it were you, where would you hit us? |
| Zak | Guys? I don't- You heard what the Nagas said. What if some part of me actually wants this to happen? Should you really be trusting me? |
| Drew | I'm your mom, Zak. I'm going to trust you. Even when it's stupid. |
| Zak | Hong Kong, |
| Doc | I'll set the course. |
| [Basel, Switzerland] | |
| Doyle | Cram it, Jurassic. It's Switzerland for all of us. |
| Van Rook | Tell me, how did you end up with the Moody one? You couldn't do any better for a partner. |
| Van Rook | Ah! Get off! Stop it, right- |
| Doyle | Nope. |
| Van Rook | This is it. |
| Van Rook | That is Basel, home of the legendary Basilisk. |
| Doyle | Great. I'll stop for autographs after we hit the latest dead end. |
| Doyle | Oh really? Come on, that's just- |
| Doyle | You know, this is even better than old and rundown. It's bug rundown. |
| Van Rook | I know these bugs. These are not good bugs. |
| Van Rook | See, now we are getting somewhere! |
| [Hong Kong, China] | |
| Zak | I'm not feeling any Cryptid activity. It's definitely not big enough for an invasion. |
| Doc | Coastline is still clear. |
| Drew | Communication satellites are quiet too. No reports of trouble. |
| Doc | Still no reason to relax our guard. When the Nagas hit, they're going to hit fast. |
| Rani Naga | [Speaking] |
| Zak | Rani Nagi said their forces were already moving. I know they've got a whole army, but we still shouldn't have beat them here by this much. |
| Drew | He's right Doc. This isn't making any sense. |
| Doc | I can only tell you what I'm seeing and I guarantee there is no not a army anywhere off the East Coast. |
| Drew | The sewers. |
| Zak | What? |
| Drew | They'll be coming up through the sewers, hang on Komodo. Zak, Doc, focus on major sewer access points. |
| Zak | There's nothing down here. |
| Drew | What? Where else could they be? |
| Doc | I've got a news feed from New York City, giant snakes coming out of the sewers in Manhattan. |
| Zak | I-I got the wrong island. |
| Doc | Honey, I love you, but we can second guess ourselves later. Right now we've got a war to stop. |
| Zak | Okay. |
| Rani Naga | Run to your human rulers. Tell them what you see here. Let them know their end has come! |
| Doyle | Seriously, the actual Loch Ness? |
| Van Rook | At least you can't say this one isn't famous. They don't get anymore- |
| Van Rook | We never negotiated for actual fighting. Do you want to pay me by the punch or-? |
| Argost | Greeting and bienvenue my loyal lovers of the lowly and lurid. I know how terribly you've missed our weekly journeys into the frightening unknown, but fret not. As you've all been so kind to remind the world Argost to lives. And while he does, Weird World can never truly die. |
| [Act 2] | |
| Rani Naga | Stop this pointless quarrel. I will divide equal portions to all of you, but no one eats until we have enough to send a message. |
| Civilian | She's going to let those things eat us. Where are the police? Where's the National Guard? |
| Civilian | National Guard don't deal with monsters, you moron. We need guys who know how to deal with these freaks. Professionals. What we need is V.V. Argost! |
| Doc | Oh please. Don't give us second thoughts about this. |
| Rani Naga | Leave Kur, slay the rest! |
| Doyle | Bag this. |
| Doyle | Micro adhesives on the hands and feet. Want to know how I spent my summer vacation? Begging I'd get another crack at you. |
| Van Rook | That work was my training. |
| Doyle | Where's Argost? I know he's in here, why not join the fight? |
| Van Rook | What spider-y guy is too boring for you? |
| Naga | Yes! That is he! Rejoice that you have lived to see the return of Kur. |
| Zak | This is all for me. You're doing this for me? |
| Doc | Then- tell them to stop! |
| Zak | Right. |
| Drew | Zak! Talk to me! |
| Zak | There's too many of them. My powers- they're hard to control. |
| Doc | Just shut it off, Zak. Shut it- |
| Drew | Doc! |
| Zak | I can't shut it off. |
| Zak | No. |
| Doyle | What are you doing? |
| Van Rook | So I'm out of shape, all right? There, I admit it. Are you happy? |
| Doyle | Get over here. |
| Van Rook | Eh, I'm tired. |
| Doyle | You. Pay cut. |
| Van Rook | Hey, who knocked out the bad guy? |
| Doyle | One bad guy. Where's Argost? |
| Doyle | Whoa. |
| Argost | Hi. |
| Doc | You got to be kidding me. |
| Van Rook | What is this machine? Hang on, let me try another. |
| Argost | Van Rook is a shiny purple doughnut monkey. |
| Doyle | It's a homemade text to speech engine. Argost was never here at all. |
| Argost | I know how terribly you've missed our weekly journeys into the frightening unknown, but fret not, as you've all been so kind to remind the world Argost lives. |
| Doyle | Munya has been the one recording weird world promos this whole time, which means Argost must really be- |
| Doyle | Gone. |
| Doc | What happened? |
| Zak | What happened? I'm Kur. I told you not to trust me! |
| Doc | Zak. I know it's been hard. |
| Zak | No, you don't know. You don't know what this Kur power is capable of... And what's really scary is I don't either. But take a look at all this. Look at my own family. Then tell me again how I'm not the bad guy. |
| Fiskerton | [Garbled] |
| Zak | Call in the Secret Scientists, Dad. |
| Doc | Zak... |
| Zak | Somebody has to fix this. |
| Doc | Zak. |
| Zak | Dad, your legs! |
| Doc | Just look me in the eyes. Do you remember what I said to you when this Kur mess started back in the jungles of Manaus? |
| Zak | I don't. |
| Doc | I told you, if the power of Kur got out into the world, you may be the only one who can stop it, no matter how complicated it's gotten since then, I still believe that. It's the one truth I'll accept without a shred of scientific evidence... I know in my gut. In my heart, that my son is here to be a force for good. It's all you've ever known how to be. |
| Zak | I guess it's just you and me again. Fisk. Got my back? |
| Fiskerton | [Garbled] |
| Zak | Then let's go show these snakes how the new Kur does business. |
| Fiskerton | [Garbled] |
| Rani Naga | No more holding back. The humans are yours. Let their screams announce the return of Kur! |
| Zak | Actually, Kur can make his own announcements. He says you're fired. |
| Rani Naga | Restrain the boy, he doesn't understand who he is. |
| Fiskerton | [Garbled] |
| Doc | One on the rear! |
| Rani Naga | Your mind is being poisoned. Child, I'm sorry if the cure hurts but it's the only way to be healed. Crush the boys parents! |
| Zak | No, not now! Come on! |
| Drew | What? |
| Doc | Hang on! |
| Zak | No! |
| Zak | Stop. |
| Zak | All right, I think your big city vacation is over. |
| Zak | Straight on to open ocean. No stopping and no humans, not ever again. Thus speaketh Kur! |
| Fiskerton | [Garbled] |
| Zak | What? It's majestic? |
| Fiskerton | [Garbled] |
| Zak | So who do you think it was that took out Rani Nagi back there? |
| Fiskerton | [Garbled] |
| Zak | I mean, I don't know why he had to be so secretive about it. Maybe he's still undercover, but it had to be him, right? |
| Argost | Oh, dear boy. |
| Zak | Fisk! |
| [Act 3] | |
| Zak | Let me go! |
| Argost | But I only just abducted you. Allow me to save at the moment. |
| Zak | No! |
| Argost | I hope now you'll believe me when I say I only want to talk. |
| Zak | We don't have anything to talk about, Argost. |
| Argost | Oh, I respectfully disagree. You are Kur. That's quite the conversation starter. |
| Argost | Oh yes, by now you must have seen what a danger you are to your family, to all of humanity? |
| Zak | I'm getting it under control. |
| Argost | But in time? Your danger is born of ignorance. You don't understand your power. You need someone to teach you how to control it before it controls you. |
| Zak | Let me guess, you're volunteering? |
| Zak | Well, I have done a bit of research on the topic. |
| Argost | The cavalry arriveth. And then I'll await your answer tonight, midnight. At the top of the Empire State Building. |
| Zak | Top of the Empire State Building? |
| Argost | I have a weakness for the classic monster cliches. |
| Argost | Adieu. |
| Drew | You were amazing, honey. |
| Doc | Total control of your Kur powers. I knew you could do it. |
| Zak | Yeah, in total control. |
| Drew | This could change everything. I mean, who knows? We may finally even convince the secret scientist that Zak isn't a threat. |
| Fiskerton | [Garbled] |
| Reporter | ...May look like tabloid footage, but this is very real. According to eyewitnesses, the boys seem to actually control the sewer snake, spurring them onto their afternoon rampage. Police and Homeland Security officials are looking for any information on- |
| Drew | Okay, well, may still need to work on your public image, but... cheer up, there's still enough good news for one day! |
| Doyle | Should I check back in tomorrow then? |
| Zak | Doyle! |
| Fiskerton | [Garbled] |
| Doyle | Good to see you too mini-man. |
| Zak | Zon! Hey, I've missed you so much. |
| Zak | Wait, wait, what's? |
| Van Rook | Get off me, you flying, crocodile. Eh, hello Drew. |
| Drew | Uh, Doyle? |
| Doyle | Yeah. Don't. Clear off. All right? Family time. |
| Doc | You said you had good news. Did you find out where Argost has been? |
| Doyle | Underground. And not in a nice way. We found Munya, but it looks like Argost is gone. Like "gone" gone. |
| Drew | Wow. Honestly, I don't know what that is. A relief? |
| Doc | As much as we could have used his knowledge of Kur, I feel safer knowing there's no way he can get to Zak. |
| Fiskerton | [Garbled] |
| Zak | Yeah, great news, Doyle. Hey, can Fisk and I talked to Doyle alone for a minute. You know, guy talk. |
| Doc | I'm a guy. |
| Drew | All right, just give the boys a minute, big guy. |
| Doyle | So what's up? |
| Zak | Argost is alive. |
| Doyle | What? |
| Zak | Just listen. okay, I need to know everything about Argost you can find. The deep history, before Weird World. Anything that will give me an edge on him. I'm sorry I can't tell you why and you cannot tell mom and Dad, but just- |
| Doyle | Done. You know, I trust you totally, mini-man. |
| Zak | Yeah, there's a lot of that going around right now. |
| Zak | So tell me how this is supposed to work. |
| Argost | It's quite simple. I have finally healed from the unpleasantness you inflicted upon me in Antarctica. Now I find myself ready to return to Weird World, both the home and the television programme, which Munya has so graciously kept alive in my absence. Through my show, I will send subtle messages to you, my young pupil to-be. Cryptids worth investigating all the things a young Kurling needs to find his place in this cruel world. Truly, it couldn't be simpler. |
| Zak | And you really think I'm going to fall for this? All is forgiven? I want to help you now? Like you won't be working some evil super genius plan behind my back? |
| Argost | You wound me, dear boy? Of course I'll be plotting behind your back. I'm going to deceive you, manipulate you, and when I've gotten what I want? Well, I'll let your imagination conjure up the gruesome finale. Your only hope of survival is that somehow the things I teach you will be enough for a twelve year old boy to outwit the world's most dangerous mind, before I rend you to pieces like a wolverine with a squeak toy! |
| Zak | ...Deal. |
| Fiskerton | [Garbled] |
| [Credits Play] |